One way to uncover your deepest values
When I was first invited to explore my personal values, I was dubious.
My initial thought was ‘I know what is most important to me already.’ I was a participant in a development workshop alongside some fellow leaders in financial services.
I was tired of chasing the next promotion, and it was the first time I had considered the idea of crafting a career plan based on a deeper understanding of myself.
Back then ‘hard work’ featured towards the top of the list of words I came up with.
What I have realised in more recent years is that a strong work ethic is a quality that the logical part of me knows is important and necessary, but I don’t feel inspired to print those particular words out and pin them to my office wall.
What was not taught in that particular training room is that uncovering our deepest and truest values has less to do with logic, and more to do with following energy.
It has less to do with rational reasoning, and more to do with intuition.
With my clients, I’ve noticed that as they dig, words that both surprise and delight them emerge. Words you might not see on a corporate ‘values’ poster. Words like freedom, play, stillness, love, boldness.
What are your words?
Here are 4 simple steps to get you started:
1) Think of a character in film, TV or literature that you adore. One who evokes a strong emotional response in you. If they’re in a film, you’re in the right territory if you’ve watched the film at least five times. Thinking of them will make you feel something. Why fiction? Stories tap into the deepest parts of our psyches, and imaginary stories can open up our thinking even more readily than ‘real-life’ ones.
Be the opposite of sensible here. Don’t rule out characters who feel a bit edgy. Who appear to have nothing whatsoever to do with work or leadership. The ones who seem ‘out there’ can point to the qualities in us that are buried especially deep, but that want more airtime in our work and lives.
2) Now, name the quality in that character that makes you feel that way about them. Don’t overthink it. Go with your gut. For example, for Andy Dufresne, the lead character in The Shawshank Redemption, it may be ‘boldness.’ There might be a minor character in a TV show who has a special place in your heart, and you love how relaxed and carefree they are. It doesn’t need to make sense to anyone else but you.
The word you have landed on - may be one of your deepest values. That is a precious thing.
3) Repeat this with different characters, or the same character but pulling out different qualities. As you do this, you will build a list of words that, in all likelihood, run deeper and truer than more ‘obvious’ answers to ‘what are your values?’
4) And finally, choose one of these qualities. What would bringing more of THAT into your leadership look like? What impact might that have? On your own experience of work and life and the people around you?
If you choose to do this exercise, I’d love to read your reflections.
